Tits Up
5 day forecast clouds in a piss cup
Trying to pinpoint when the **** went **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Whatcha gonna do to get your ass out of this rut
So you don’t live your whole life **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
(Zigga-zigga-zigga-zigga)
Precious, brothers ain’t a name in lights
A last rice cake shared under flames and dice
That know to cope, gotta swap old campfire chillers
The kind that only grow in vampire state cellars
And climb out of jars when they migrate westward
Where they were free of any chessboard square
Hi, I don’t shake beer in the dark
I write but I’m no Shakespeare in the park
I’m a grownsed up punk with an ear for a heart and I hear you
Please wait here for the ark
Yes sir. Likely to fester inactive unless they address all the death
And distraction, shake hands with a foxhole raider
Got a grip like c-c-c-combo breaker
Tally up the dead folk squashed in a car
Fire still warm they couldn’t have gone far
Packed up tough in your double stuff swim trunks
Cannonballs recalled when your **** split **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
New high score on the IHop Dig-Dug
Pretty cool otherwise pretty much **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
How can I save you when I can barely save myself?
Codependent No More on my audiobook shelf
Cruise to your town in my cape and my unitard
See what I can do with my lyrics and my guitar
Now I got my sidekick who brings the beatdown
Have you seen the size of his feet? Clown
Shoes with his own name in gold on the side
If you’re in the dark we’ll bring a little Lite Brite
Pop in the pegs
Make cute pictures
Pick up some merch, make us permanent fixtures
On the self-help shelf of your record collection
So if shit’s **** up you can make the selection
That will take you from limp to a little bit pumped up
Our HQ is a gluten free bun truck
Shhh, zip your lips
Don’t tell the bad guys
Shine that giant fun-cicle into the sky
Wait a few months for us to arrive
Big group hug, a little awkward \"Hi\"
One day you’re in luck
One day you’re stealing cigarettes from a flipped truck
**** face, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
You feel a little better when we sign your high tops
When you get home it’s the same old **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
One half megafawna one half mall rat, haul ass
Straight face, dove-tailed ball cap
Grape ape unveil plans for the van use
Drive to your **** town, tell you that your band rules
Live with the get down, maybe out of shampoo
Radio on scan for a stanza to lampoon
Under the bum drum cutter is a real mother****ers' mother****er, mother****er
Alex Karras and Conraid Bain and Leather Tuscadero
And Pinky and the Brain re-enacting the Universal ************ movie
Dolph cold ***** Courtney love boobies and that over the shoulder anaconda holder
You were close to the hole, you’re getting colder
Bogeyed your birdie when I powdered my putter
But there ain’t no fluffer that can fluff this nutter
One day you’re in love, one day your pills suck
One day your shits ****ed, tip tuck **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Snookie in a snuggie at the Walt Whitman pitstop
Cinnabon, Bon Jovi, slippery **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
High noon, milk duds, cherry cola big gulp
Corn dog, dim sum, moon pie, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Swab your six lips with chloroform litmus
Color forms, whore shack, Rorschach, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Hey Mom, life’s good, works great, tip tops
P.S. send cash, half dead, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Riding on the back of Undercat Battlepop
Underoos, big sword, top drawers, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Can’t plug an old faithful with a fist ****
No rain coat, no dice go **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Shine my shoe kicking elevator missed hugs
Seventeenth floor nothing but bugs, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Brunch at the strip club, corn beef, crisp ones
Four teeth, pink tux, pornstache, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Joey Martin Lawrence – WHOA! Little Stevie King Tut
Bad taste walkaways, eternal blame, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
This’ll be remembered as the year you ruined Christmas
Figgy pudding everywhere, shitty footing **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Willy Wonka shooting blanks, Tae Bo Banks catwalk
Looking glass, flexed ass, fizzy lifting **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Block block, chop block, chop, kick, kick, punch
Step over the line if you ever feel **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!
T-t-t-**** up!
Bert cake, unabomber, eyebrow, shit’s punk
Trimmed muff not so much, fluff’s tough, **** up
T-t-t-t-**** up!