Defenders of Marriage

Every time we think about same s*x marriage

It makes us sick to our guts

I mean

Two people who want to commit to a stable

Monogamous life long relationship

What are they

Nuts

It's unnatural

Now a man should not lie with a person who is a guy

He should only lie to his wife

The bible is clear

We're —

Defenders of marriage

In three button suits

We'll raise our double standard and see who salutes

Defenders of marriage

Defending the institution against people who want to get married

Every time we think about same s*x parents

Oh

My gosh we exclaim

I mean

Two people who want to provide a protective

And nurturing family environment

Have they no shame

It's so deviant

It's the lord's holy word

As my second wife said to my third

That a family's based on obligation and fear

We're —

Defenders of marriage

Connubial narcs

Ever vigilant and patriotic patriarchs

Defenders of marriage

Defending the institution against people who want to get married

One summer evening when my woman was doing laundry

I shared a six pack with an old john bircher

And oh so wisely he imparted an ancient quandary

To ponder

He said

It's nature versus legislature

Are people born gay

Or do they turn gay just to piss off d**k armey

We're an army of d**ks

With a militant stance

Let's get the government out of our lives and into our pants

Defenders of marriage

Defending the institution against people who want to get married

And have their insurance carried

And be beneficiary'd

And be next to the ones they love when they are buried